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Month: July 2015

Love your enemies or at least don’t unfriend them

Love your enemies or at least don’t unfriend them

 

I’m going to say it and I’m sorry for how crude this is but social networks are becoming something of a circle-jerk. I know that most of my friends read the Guardian and those that find it too pretentious are at least still lefties. I know that if I share something against the Conservatives, I’ll get a lot of likes. Especially if it’s a post about wanting them to die, try and live off benefits or how disgraceful food banks are. Within my social (network) circles, everybody seems to feel the same. Some people are VERY SNP, some are VERY Greens and some people are still brave enough to admit that they support Labour. It’s nice, in a way. Sort of. The lefties are still attacking lefties and suggesting you don’t think Labour aren’t an abomination to God seems to be a little taboo but mostly, we’re all the same.

It’s boring.

I used to delete everybody I disagreed with and I really regret the decision now. Disagreement does not mean cut all ties. Disagreement makes way for interesting conversations, for debates and most importantly, understanding. It’s easy to think that all Conservatives/Conservative voters are evil monsters straight from a charity shop horror book but they’re not and their reasons for voting aren’t because they want the poor to die or because they’re rich people who’ve never had to worry about anything in their lives. They have different priorities when voting and I’m sorry guys but that’s fine.

The second you paint a person, a group of people, even a political party as ‘monsters’, you’ve lost. Monster means not human and if something isn’t human, you immediately assume that you don’t have to understand it. Understanding is crucial not only in interpersonal relationships but in politics. While I’m relieved that everybody seems more politically aware after being the bonafide politics geek for years, it’s frustrating to see political parties being treated like rock stars and opposing viewpoints like the plague. I have to say, it’s disturbing. We live in a democracy.

I don’t like the Conservatives. I support the Green party and actually quite like Labour (okay, I like Jeremy Corbyn and did like Labour. We’re all disenchanted). I don’t want Conservatives to win another election and I even wrote a post on how to help out in wake of inevitable cuts. I do, however, care about why my (very few) friends who voted Conservative, did so. I care about understanding all political parties and their intentions as much as possible. I care about democracy and not just on my own terms but democracy, even when I don’t like the results.

This is a new thing for me, trust me. But I’ve enjoyed learning, I’ve enjoyed understanding and once or twice, I’ve found myself even agreeing with my Conservative voting pals. They’re scared to speak up, though and I don’t blame them.

If people who are lefties find themselves afraid to speak, what hope is there for the opposing side?

I’ve seen this across the board. It’s not just politics, it’s everything. People are being shouted down because popular people on Twitter dislike their views and their followers back them up. What are you doing? Do you think you’re stopping the views being held by shouting them down? How is this progressive in the slightest? What can we gain from refusing to acknowledge viewpoints?

The fantastic thing about the internet is how connected we are. It’s how many different walk of lives we can be in touch with, sharing information with in lightspeed time. It’s REALLY beautiful! We don’t have to have the small world around us, we have it all at our fingertips but if you keep deleting those who aren’t the same, if you keep shouting down those trying to use their voice, you’ll inadvertently end up with the internet equivalent of small town syndrome. Lefty Land Syndrome, if you will. Okay, yeah, that’s horrendous but you get it.

This is fairly dry for me, I’ll go back to slagging myself off and offering advice on depression again before you know it.

Reading my Livejournal 10 years later pt.1

Reading my Livejournal 10 years later pt.1

I honestly never thought I’d laugh at who I was when I was fifteen but it turns out, my Livejournal was almost too good to be true and once I remembered the password, I couldn’t not laugh and share it. It’s been 10 years. I’ve grown. I’m a better person now. I’m well-adjusted. I’m no longer ’emo’. Well, I am. But I’m the grown up version that can only be identified by fellow old emos.

 

June 18th, 2005

Capture

I don’t even know where to start. Pink background with rainbow paragraphs? Jesus Christ. Not to mention needless, NEEDLESS text talk. Text talk was all the rage 10 years ago so I’ll give myself a bit of leeway I guess. I wasn’t texting, or even on a phone but okay.

I actually remember this day, and it was pretty awkward. All of the ‘alternative’ kids sat at one lunch table together so even if there was beef, we sat together. It was pretty intense. That being said, blogging about the problem probably didn’t help.

Stevie is one of the boyfriends I really cringe at. He was obsessed with Jesus, and thought music wasn’t for him because he was straight. His words. Ugh. Anyway, nobody thought our relationship was fake. Nobody fucking cared! But hey look, the guy came and visited me so he was clearly something of a hero. A whole bus journey. Whoa.

June 21st, 2005

“Woke up to find a text off stevie sayin that he was particulary upset about a conversation we’d had the night before. All I said was I felt a bit used n asked if we could go slower n he seemed kwl but then he said he couldnt think straight… I mean! huh?!

Anyway… that resulted in me feelin a bit low but I went in2 maths n got cheered up by Myles lol hes jus so… lkike… mad!lol,  went to txt stevie 2 apologise 4 makin him feel tht way n ma teacher caught me godamn bastard.!!”

This is a bit sad. Stevie really wanted us to have sex and I really, really didn’t. I just wasn’t there, and I was pretty grossed out at the thought if I’m honest. So when he tried to talk me into it again, I told him that I wanted us to go slower and he told me the next day that had upset him. I was fairly naive and extremely sensitive so this really threw me off for the entire day. I felt absolutely terrible and so guilty.

I’m so glad the teacher caught me because I ended up being dumped for not ‘caring enough’ about Stevie to reply. Thank you maths teacher, you old Tory bastard. Stevie got back with me a couple of weeks later, but before we’d had a chance to be reunited under the stars, I was dumped again so that he could go to God camp. I’m really not joking. He ended up going to my friend’s school in Liverpool to talk about religion and why they should accept God. Sigh.

June 29th, 2005

“Today….

Got up at 11, watched some tv n then I checked over ma mum’s application form for her  n then came on this :p

Anyway troopz am away, I got to get packed n ready goin 2 liverpool for 2 days

catch yeez. ;)”

I honestly don’t know why my mum asked me to check over her application when I was clearly not the most intelligent. Nobody loves you like your mother does, eh?

‘Troopz’?!!? TROOPZ?! If you haven’t heard me actually speak, you might not understand what makes this so intensely fucking funny but TROOPZ?! Then ‘catch yeez ;)’ what the actual fuck, Sarah?! Apart from the fact that I was talking like a standard Yahoo! Messenger bam, I never, ever said those words out loud. I would have been laughed at. I’m not sure I even know how to say yeez. It just doesn’t suit my voice. Fucking hell I’m cringing. This is why I had no friends.

July 5th, 2005

When I was younger, I wanted to be an actress, it was my absolute dream and I thought I was the best at it in the world. I dont have that dream anymore, I want to be a journalist, in the media.

Last night when I was in my bed, I realised that I’m an actor already, when I’m sad I act like I’m happy although I’m not, not to everyone, just a lot of people.

I remember this as well. I really thought it was an epiphany. Deep man, deep.

July 23rd, 2005

So I gots home after just about dodging the police coz the stupid dafty who lives above me told them I was drunked. I also told him he rocked =S but he doesnt. Like at all. So yeh! home, right, got in and gave my mum a hug =/ and gave her my starburst =/ then sat on the couch and babbled some shit to my mum about Cheryl sayin she didnt like me an oh yeh pml I called her a ned last night and she started screamin that she wasnt a ned /=]. Yeh! home dammit! then I went on pc, spoke 2 a few people then my mum said she needed to talk to me so… I went in2 Kitchen n she asked if I’d been drinkin and I told her the truth, it was kinda obvious anyway, I could just about walk so she told me 2 sign off msn n go to bed with some water.  

This is from the first time I got drunk. It’s a really long post that I didn’t think needed to be entirely shared. The guy upstairs doesn’t rock ‘like at all’ but I clearly fucking did, as we’ve learned. I don’t know who the Cheryl in question is but I’m sorry she had to deal with the absolute state I was in after drinking vodka straight from the bottle. When I finally stumbled into the house, I handed my mum sweets and told her I loved her in front of people so even if I wasn’t so blatantly hammered, I was a real cause for concern. I’m glad she was as patient as she was with me that night because I was an absolute fucking riot. I did get grounded for the rest of the summer, though which didn’t rock. Like, at-all.

I’ll leave it there for now but I hope you enjoyed this absolute cringe-fest!