27 life lessons at 27


Good grief I’m 27.

It’s the time of year again where I list all of the lessons learned in the past year. This past year has been one massive upheaval. My life turned upside down French Prince style and I am just now starting to find my feet again. Sort of.

  1. Ask for help when you need it
    I am pretty bad for letting things truly pile on top of me until I have an eventual breakdown and surprise everybody with statements on just how bad things have gotten. I struggle to let people help me. My pride is definitely one of my worst traits and once I finally let that go and asked the people that had been trying to help to be there for me, my life improved 100%. Things were still difficult but I wasn’t alone.
  2. Take the risk
    As much as I talk about how difficult this year has been, I have found myself in the ideal job for me. I love it. I love the people I work with, I love the work I do, I never resent going to work. I love it so much I’m not even fussed that it’s another 3 months until I have a decent amount of time off. I got this job because I took a risk. I didn’t actually think I’d even get to the interview stage and here I am, 2 interviews and 8 months after applying, working for a great company.
  3. Stay busy
    This isn’t for everybody but for me, staying busy keeps my head above water. Staying creative, product and sociable is so important, especially when times are tough
  4. … but acknowledge when you need a break, and take it
  5. Explore more
    My friend Greig and I have been friends for 10 years but it was only this year that we decided to start actually going on mini adventures together. We spent hours walking around the Falls of Clyde, we did the audio tour of Doune Castle (highly recommended!), we’ve explored the fields around Greig’s local area and most recently, we visited Pollok Park for the first time. We have some more exciting adventures planned for next year, even a wee trip away overnight together! These days out are ideal for blowing away cobwebs.
  6. What you want matters
    I think it’s a millenial thing. We’ve only ever known recession in our adult lives, really, so we spend a lot of time being grateful for what we have and in terms of material things, that is excellent. Relationships, romantic or otherwise, not so much. What I want from a friendship, a relationship, fuck it – a kiss! Matters.
  7. There’s strength in being vulnerable
    I can’t really expand on this as I have a big piece planned on it but seriously, I’m not ashamed of being soft, vulnerable, anything. It’s bravery.
  8. “How people treat other people is a direct reflection of how they feel about themselves.” ― Paulo Coelho
  9. More people care than you ever think
  10. It’s never too late to take the steps to becoming who you want to be 
  11. It’s okay to be sad
    It is no secret that I was sad this year. I still am a lot of the time. I have this awful habit of trying to push feelings away but recently, I’ve accepted that sometimes, I just am sad. And that’s okay.
  12. I’ll keep you safe, you keep me strong”
  13. Let people look after you
    It never occurred to me after my breakup that my friends actually wanted to look after me. I felt like a burden on them. I was sad enough, why put them through it, too? Turns out they wanted to help. They wanted to hold my hand through dark times, they wanted me to be myself around them, even if  myself was nothing short of a broken mess. Through all of this heartache and sadness, I’ve never felt alone. The outpouring of love towards me has been overwhelming in the very best way. Allowing people to look after me, saved me.
  14. If nothing else, Tinder is good for the ego. I’ve still got it. Sorta.
  15. There is no such thing as too much Sangria.
  16. Make plans. Make plans. Make plans.
    Making plans really helps me. Knowing that there are things to look forward to, things to focus on, helps. As do countdown timer apps.
  17. Write often
    Even if I know it won’t be published, even if I’m not 100% confident in what I’m writing, I write.
  18. If somebody sends you a link on OkCupid, don’t open it
    … Seriously. Blegh. I should know better.
  19. Better yet, just delete your OkCupid account
  20. Have confidence in your decisions
    From TV shows to jobs, owning my decisions has been SO worthwhile. I am learning to trust my intuition more.
  21. The Mountain Goats are underrated and are great for so many occasions
  22. Home is where the cats are
  23. Treat. Yo. Self.
  24. “Apathy is a cancer” – B Dolan
    With 2016 being so very… 2016, it’s tempting to give in to apathy. God knows it’d be easier. But I refuse. I’m angry, I’m despairing and I’m determined. I can only do so much but if I can make tiny changes, in the tiny space of the world that I occupy, it’s something.
  25. There are not enough candles and fairy lights in the world to satiate my hunger
  26. Some people come into your life and are exactly what you need at that specific time. And that’s enough.
  27. If you can stay hopeful, you’re indestructible. 



30 day TREAT YOURSELF challenge


I failed Blogtober. I’m not even sorry. Any time I wasn’t writing, I was drinking wine, I was watching movies, I was on dates, I was not stressing out about not writing for Blogtober. It was a good challenge, and I admire those that got through it but man I’m so done with 30 day challenges.

I saw somebody say today that she’s cutting out Netflix and chocolate in November AND she’s attempting NaNoWriMo. Again, commendable but where do we draw the line? Why are we so consistently determined to suffer? Another one I’ve seen is 30 days of gratitude. I’m a big cheerleader for gratitude and I think recognising what I have to be grateful for has made me a happier, better person but sometimes, like today, I’m not grateful and dude, that’s fine. That’s more than fine!

Despite 2016 being some never-ending hell, despite Brexit, despite the uncertainty of our country’s future, we are still not letting ourselves be pissed off. We’re still going on about embracing mindfulness. We’re still squashing down emotions and trying to out-perfect ourselves. Enough. I can’t watch it any more guys. It’s been a tough old year, we need to be more gentle on ourselves.

Give yourself a break! TREAT. YO. SELF.

If you insist on doing a 30 day challenge, might I suggest my one. That I just made up.

  1. Be angry. Feel. Scream. Whatever, just let it all out. Fuck it. Don’t harm anyone, obviously.
  2. See that dickhead? The one that has been pissing you off for months? The one who makes you fake-smile so hard you think your cheeks might blow up? Have a good ol’ rant about them. A big rant. Let it allllll the fuck out. I know, right? Why do they sneeze SO LOUDLY?!
  3. Cancel plans. You didn’t want to go. They know, deep down, you don’t want to go. Just cancel them and basque in the sweet relief that this brings.
  4. Okay, just for some “posi vibes”, buy yourself that thing. The thing you keep going back to. The thing that has been following you around the internet since you first went on the page. Buy it. You won’t spend that money on anything else worthwhile.
  5. Have you earned that nap? Who fucking cares? Nap. Should you really be napping when you could be doing more productive things? Who cares? Nap.
  6. It’s Sunday. You had a takeaway on Friday, you were out last night so really, you’ve met your calorie limit for the week. But that means nothing, it’s Sunday, they’re depressing. Get the pizza you’re craving. If you’re going for pizza, you may as well go all out. Don’t offend your own senses by getting low-fat pizza.
  7. Trying to listen to music that is refined and looks cool when people spy on your Spotify? Stop. Listen to whatever. Why are you even ashamed of the music you listen to? Fuck what other people think, music is there to be enjoyed. Just enjoy it. Everybody loves Bieber these days anyway.
  8. Been meaning to unfollow somebody on Twitter but don’t want to cause drama? Fuck the drama, unfollow them. Treat yourself to a less infuriating feed.
  9. You have been meaning to read that book and yeah, we all should be reading more but just this once… Watch your tacky show. You love it. That’s all that matters.
  10. Fall asleep looking at your phone. It’s bad for you but so is capitalism and here we are.
  11. Fancy skipping the gym? GO FOR IT. I’m proud of you for your resilience against that sweaty hellhole. Just think, you won’t have to watch a bunch of insufferable LADS take over machines tonight because you’re not going to the gym.
  12. Can the dishes reaaaallly be put off til tomorrow? Yup. Do it.
  13. Fuck it, ignore them today too. It’s Sunday.
  14. Treat yourself for doing the dishes by going to that thing you weren’t sure if you could justify. Here is your justification.
  15. Go to a park, enjoy what’s left of Autumn, embrace nature and take some selfies because damn, you look cute today. Embracing nature and your beauty do not need to be mutually exclusive. Also, there will be dogs and it is nothing short of an outrage if you don’t take photos of the dogs for your friends.
  16. No, you really don’t want to go to the Christmas party. So don’t say you will. Just don’t go. Your colleagues shouldn’t have to put up with your eye-rolling but more importantly, your eyes are vital and should not be rolled as much as they inevitably will be at the Christmas do.
  17. Go to the cinema alone. It will maybe make you feel a little more wholesome, independent, mindful but it will definitely ensure that you don’t have somebody nudging you every time something funny/remarkable/shocking happens.
  18. What a hellish week eh? Have a wee cry. We all love a wee cry, it’s fine.
  19. Have a big bubble bath. No need for it to be Lush products, just a big bath. Listen to a podcast you love. Go for a nap after it because post-bath naps are the best. Don’t even bother getting changed, just flop down in your towel for an hour or so. Four hours. Whatever. You do you.
  20. Anything you think you can’t justify in your weekly shop, here is your justification: TREAT. YO. SELF. Those cookies are not going to eat themselves.
  21. You do need to get round to watching Stranger Things. Everybody says it’s the best show, ever, but y’know what? Why not watch your favourite show that you’ve already seen 30 times? You’re not ready to start a new series and that’s cool.
  22. It’s not December yet and everybody is berating you for ‘already’ watching Christmas movies. Fuck them. Love, Actually is a classic and can be watched multiple times between now and Christmas. Watch the movie. Regardless of when you start celebrating Christmas, “To me, you are perfect”.
  23. That champagne that’s saved for a special occasion? That occasion is today! Congratulations! I’m so thrilled for you! Enjoy your mid-week drinks!
  24. Don’t look at the news today. Have a day off. Give your brain a day off. Watch some kitten cam videos.
  25. She said what!? Who cares? Have a nice day of not acknowledging anything outrageous on social media. Other people will chime in. You don’t need to. Treat yourself.
  26. Last Saturday of November can only mean one thing – TREAT YO SELF SATURDAY. You’re going to be stressed about Christmas for the next few weekends so this weekend, do nothing
  27. I meant nothing.
  28. Remember when that person was not as much of a dick as they are now? You’ve been meaning to talk to them about it for, ooh, two years maybe? Cut them out. Cut them loose. You don’t need this stress.
  29. Feeling pretty proud of something you’ve done recently? Tell people! Embrace their compliments and stop feeling like you ought not to be so ‘showy’. Be as showy as you want, babe, you worked hard on this. Or you didn’t. Who cares, you still pulled it off.
  30. PAYDAY. TREAT YO SELF. Buy that relative that not-so-secretly hates you something a little less expensive this year and spend the remainder on YOU.

4 steps to slowly get back to normal


Photograph by Ryan McGuire and laughandpee.com
Photograph by Ryan McGuire and laughandpee.com

So no-one told you life was gonna be this way CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. Your job’s a joke, you’re broke, Friends ruined your idea of what your twenties should beeeeee….

This year has been tough. I’m not going to lie, I have been having a tough, tough time and I keep having to stop myself asking everybody to cuddle me. I feel like every time I’ve tried to do something, or get somewhere in life, I’ve been smacked in the face with reality. The reality being that the road to success isn’t a short and straight one and no matter how feel life should turn out… I don’t get to fully dictate my own destiny or anybody else’s around me.

It’s been a year of this so far:

I used to find this funny and now it’s all too real…

I know I won’t be the only person feeling like this and I also know it’s difficult to find hope so I’m writing this wee list for both myself and you. I can’t promise we’ll kick 2015’s ass but it’d be nice to gently edge out of endless self-pity. Even if just for a fleeting 5 minutes.

What’s happened has happened
Unfortunately, this mindset can’t apply to huge tragedies- they’re far too personal for me to offer advice. This is for those who have had a hard time whether it’s with partners, work, family issues… whatever. It’s happened. If you can turn it around, try. If it’s well beyond that point, it’s time to move on and accept that regardless of what you would have done differently, what’s done is absolutely done. It doesn’t matter who is right or wrong or if it’s just SO FUCKING UNFAIR, it’s done.

Once you realise that there’s no undoing what’s been done, it can be quite liberating.

Get out of bed

I work, so I get out of bed every morning. I’m actually quite proud of myself for this one. It seems menial and everybody else manages it but man, when you can’t face the day, getting out of bed is the hardest part. That being said, I climb back into bed as soon as I can. At the weekend, I tend to flop around until I have obligations (more on that in a moment). It’s a really bad habit to be in and one that needs to be kicked to the curb as soon as possible.

Let yourself wallow, play about on social media on your phone for a while but then get up and stay up. Bed is so much sweeter when it’s a the end of the day and I’ve made a point, or I’m trying to, of not going back to bed at any point in the day.

Make plans

Both short and long term plans will help you so, so much. I’ve just made plans to go to Berlin with my boyfriend in November, this means that on the days I can’t face the world, I remind myself that I have a holiday later this year. I’ve also made plans to visit a friend 2 nights from now. We’ve been friends for 10 years, it’s not emotionally exhausting seeing him but when I’m down, I avoid people as much as possible. It used to be really bad- I would only see my boyfriend and cats for weeks at a time. Staying in touch and staying active will save your mind. Having things to look forward to will save your mind or if nothing else, give you something to work towards.

Get the right amount of sleep

This is a fussy one. When I’m down, I sleep for around 10-14 hours at the weekend (see, having a job helps, I can’t sleep for that long usually). So instead of getting plenty of sleep, I recommend getting the right amount of sleep. If you know what works for your body, great, if not, experiment. Some people only need 4 hours sleep but others can’t get by on anything less than 8. Whatever works for you, make it happen. This combined with a set bedtime will work wonders.


I could write more but I think what I have written is achievable but not daunting. Which is what I really need right now, and maybe you do too. Achievable goals are a great place to start and the more realistic they seem, the more likely we are to pull them off.

If you don’t manage to do these every day, you haven’t failed, you haven’t fallen back into old routines – tomorrow is another chance. I’m sorry, I know that’s quite trite but it’s also accurate. This isn’t a 30 day challenge, it’s just a tiny Get Your Shit Together challenge that can be picked up and dropped at will.


6 Things All Girls Should Know By the Time They’re 25

I have been 25 for 155 days. So, between being 24 and 25 I have obviously become something of a wise old owl and am definitely in a place where I can give advice to impressionable, insecure women who are younger than me and wondering if they’re doing the whole ‘life’ thing right. And of course, because I’m 25 I can also impart wisdom gained from only my own experiences and give it as blanket advice to women regardless of their circumstances.unsplash

Let’s go!

  1. These lists are bullshit.
    You’re not a bad person because you read these lists; everybody reads them. They’re called clickbait for a reason and we all would like to know what we have in store/if we’re doing things ‘right’ but when it comes to it, there’s no right way of living and everybody’s circumstances are different.
  2. You’re never too old to fucking travel
    Man, this one annoys me. Rich people telling poor people that they should just ‘drop everything’ and travel. If you can’t afford to travel, that’s fine. You can save and one day travel, if you want to. You are not even 25- stop worrying about this! The whole world will be out there in 10, 20 years so you keep doing you and stop worrying about travelling. Hell, if you don’t want to travel that’s also fine! I feel like this isn’t said enough but you are under no obligation to want to travel. I realise there are people in their 40’s who say they wish they’d travelled more but there are also those who say they wish they’d spent more time with their families.
  3. No beauty product has the power to stop your ‘ageing process’
    There is no age when you need to start thinking about looking younger or reversing your ageing process. The beauty industry has a hell of a lot to answer for but one of the most pressing questions for me is where the fuck do you get off making women feel insecure about their AGE?! Whenever I imagine using these overpriced, garbage products I imagine my face eventually looking like this. You don’t need to find your ideal product, you need to get away from the idea that your age is something to be ashamed of.
  4. 30 isn’t scary
    I refuse to believe it. Only 30 years into life and it’s done? ‘Over the hill’? Do me a favour. Your twenties are the residual hangover from your teen years, they’re tough as fuck and if you’re unhappy THAT’S OK. You don’t need to make the most of every waking moment, you need to look after yourself and your mental health. These might not be the best years of your life! In fact, I hope they’re not because it’s a little soon to be saying the golden days are over. 30 really is just an age and all the things you’re ‘supposed’ to do in your twenties can be done in your thirties. Don’t believe the hype, it’s a boring, poorly-reasoned ideal that turning 30 is all doom and gloom.
  5. There is no pre-destined age to know what you want to do with your life
    By 25, you might be in your dream career and hey, you might not have a fucking clue. Both are fine. These lists telling you that you should have taken the steps to discover your true calling are written by people who are lucky enough to have ~*~ discovered their dreams~*~. We’re in a terrible financial climate, still, and jobs aren’t everything. As hard as it may be, try to focus on other things in your life because it’ll come in time. Or it won’t. Either way, you’ll be okay. My nan didn’t have big career dreams but she did have a huge life full of love and adventure- everybody’s path is different.
  6. Happy people aren’t necessarily smug people
    Every time I read these lists, there’s a hell of a lot of snark towards people who got married or had children young and like to talk about their partners and kids often. These people aren’t bad people for being happy. They’re not necessarily smug people and making fun of them isn’t getting you anywhere. I know there’s a certain comfort in knowing everybody has their hard times and every couple goes through rough patches but it’s also fairly cynical to use their lives to feel better about your own. I read a really great article about this that really changed my mind on the happy vs smug mentality. You can read it here.


So there you have it! I don’t believe in these lists and I make a point to not follow them. I genuinely worry about how much they influence people or make them paranoid as whenever I’ve read them, I’ve worried I’m not enough. Not successful enough, not travelling enough, etc. When really, there’s no determined way for us to live and nobody ought to feel like they’re not enough by the standards of some writer that has had an entirely different life experience.

Don’t take this too seriously, it was absolutely tongue in cheek but really, anti-ageing products can fuck off.