So no-one told you life was gonna be this way CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. Your job’s a joke, you’re broke, Friends ruined your idea of what your twenties should beeeeee….
This year has been tough. I’m not going to lie, I have been having a tough, tough time and I keep having to stop myself asking everybody to cuddle me. I feel like every time I’ve tried to do something, or get somewhere in life, I’ve been smacked in the face with reality. The reality being that the road to success isn’t a short and straight one and no matter how I feel life should turn out… I don’t get to fully dictate my own destiny or anybody else’s around me.
It’s been a year of this so far:
I know I won’t be the only person feeling like this and I also know it’s difficult to find hope so I’m writing this wee list for both myself and you. I can’t promise we’ll kick 2015’s ass but it’d be nice to gently edge out of endless self-pity. Even if just for a fleeting 5 minutes.
What’s happened has happened
Unfortunately, this mindset can’t apply to huge tragedies- they’re far too personal for me to offer advice. This is for those who have had a hard time whether it’s with partners, work, family issues… whatever. It’s happened. If you can turn it around, try. If it’s well beyond that point, it’s time to move on and accept that regardless of what you would have done differently, what’s done is absolutely done. It doesn’t matter who is right or wrong or if it’s just SO FUCKING UNFAIR, it’s done.
Once you realise that there’s no undoing what’s been done, it can be quite liberating.
Get out of bed
I work, so I get out of bed every morning. I’m actually quite proud of myself for this one. It seems menial and everybody else manages it but man, when you can’t face the day, getting out of bed is the hardest part. That being said, I climb back into bed as soon as I can. At the weekend, I tend to flop around until I have obligations (more on that in a moment). It’s a really bad habit to be in and one that needs to be kicked to the curb as soon as possible.
Let yourself wallow, play about on social media on your phone for a while but then get up and stay up. Bed is so much sweeter when it’s a the end of the day and I’ve made a point, or I’m trying to, of not going back to bed at any point in the day.
Both short and long term plans will help you so, so much. I’ve just made plans to go to Berlin with my boyfriend in November, this means that on the days I can’t face the world, I remind myself that I have a holiday later this year. I’ve also made plans to visit a friend 2 nights from now. We’ve been friends for 10 years, it’s not emotionally exhausting seeing him but when I’m down, I avoid people as much as possible. It used to be really bad- I would only see my boyfriend and cats for weeks at a time. Staying in touch and staying active will save your mind. Having things to look forward to will save your mind or if nothing else, give you something to work towards.
Get the right amount of sleep
This is a fussy one. When I’m down, I sleep for around 10-14 hours at the weekend (see, having a job helps, I can’t sleep for that long usually). So instead of getting plenty of sleep, I recommend getting the right amount of sleep. If you know what works for your body, great, if not, experiment. Some people only need 4 hours sleep but others can’t get by on anything less than 8. Whatever works for you, make it happen. This combined with a set bedtime will work wonders.
I could write more but I think what I have written is achievable but not daunting. Which is what I really need right now, and maybe you do too. Achievable goals are a great place to start and the more realistic they seem, the more likely we are to pull them off.
If you don’t manage to do these every day, you haven’t failed, you haven’t fallen back into old routines – tomorrow is another chance. I’m sorry, I know that’s quite trite but it’s also accurate. This isn’t a 30 day challenge, it’s just a tiny Get Your Shit Together challenge that can be picked up and dropped at will.